Clarification

So, Brant read my latest post on raising the little boys and he commented "you don't pull any punches" which is his way of saying I might have been a little harsh... not trying to say AT ALL that moms in America with Cheerios and applesauce and nice carpeted floors have no problems or worries raising their kids... I read internet news and am so thankful for so many things I don't have to worry about here. And not trying to say at all that I don't like my little boys or that I don't thank the Lord daily for the privilege of raising them. Just being honest... it's hard to be a mom sometimes and just because I'm a missionary doesn't mean I'm on some "easy parenting track" with God. :)

And, truth be told, I always wanted to be a missionary - before I was married and a mom. So some days it's hard to be a mom and let Brant be the missionary. But I remember that this is a season and God has me here in this country with these boys... to serve Him however He sees fit... and despite how hard it can be at times to raise little boys... I will miss it.

Little boys

Funny how fast and slow kids grow up... and how they are in a constant state of flux. Honestly, we are tired and frustrated with how hard it is to raise 3 little kids at one time - someone is always crying, waking up at night, having a runny nose or a cranky day. Can drive us crazy! It's just a lot of work to keep them fed, bathed, happy (as in not hitting each other) and then trying to add any type of training/discipline/home-schooling to the mix and we often end each day wiped out and discouraged. But they are growing and changing so fast...

- Elijah, at almost 5, can now bathe himself (pretty much - have to make sure he uses the right amount of soap and not the whole bottle!) It is SO nice to be able to say "Elijah, go get a bath" and he does. Makes me dream of the day when bathing little boys doesn't take an hour of each evening.

- We are working on potty-training Caleb. It's been a horrible, messy, slow process. But the very fact that we're working on it means the end of diapers is in sight with him. So that will mean we will have more kids OUT of diapers than IN diapers. We calculated last night the savings from him alone will be enough to buy a plane ticket to Bali in a year. :)

- Ezra is eating real food... has also been a process. He's my only kid who has not easily taken to eating people food. It's kinda funny, really, as he's so incredibly fat, you would think all he likes to do is eat. But in reality he just likes his mommy. :) But as he begins to warm up to rice cereal and bananas I am seeing weaning around the corner. No more nursing my baby...

So we comfort ourselves by saying that in the next 5 years or so our lives should be a lot easier. It's funny, when we were in the States people always told us "Enjoy this time when the kids are small... it's goes so fast and then you miss it." Here people say "Don't worry; you will get through it and it will be over soon." I think the difference is not that missionaries are negative people who don't like little kids, but that life is so much harder over here and having little kids brings a lot of challenges.... medical issues (we are constantly treating one kid or the other for fungus, skin infections, parasites); cleanliness issues (DON'T EVEN THINK OF LETTING ONE DROP OF BATH WATER GET NEAR YOUR MOUTH OR YOU WILL GET SOME HORRIBLE PARASITE YOU COULD DIE FROM); and a whole host of other things... don't touch the dog that probably has rabies; don't crawl on the floor - even though I just mopped it - the ants and termites and spiders are thick; smile and eat whatever weird thing the national people just offered you or it will ruin our testimony; be quiet and entertained on 24+ hour plane rides; sit through a church service in a language you don't understand for 2 hours with no nursery or Sunday school class....

The other thing is PB&J is really expensive here... and Goldfish crackers, applesauce, and Cheerios are non-existent. How are you supposed to raise kids without Cheerios? :)

Last night I stumbled onto a blog of a mom of 4 little kids. She called it "Cherishing the little hands" and it was on how great and fun little kids are and how much she enjoyed her little kids. I bet she doesn't stay up at night and wonder if the anti-malaria medicine she gives her kids will destroy their livers or if it's better to give her kids skin cancer from bug spray or dengue fever from mosquito bites.

We love our little boys and the funny things they say and how they are so snugly and cute at this age. But I will be so thankful when we are past the eating dirt stage. Maybe it's just my Western prejudice, but I think American dirt is cleaner.

PS

Also really, really miss milk. We drink... or should I say "use" (don't drink it!) powdered milk... works great for making yogurt and is decent on cereal... but a nice cold glass of creamy milk...

And (thanks to Joy!) was also reminded that I would kill for some chips and salsa. Avocados are cheap and plentiful for guacamole, but no tortilla chips around - and yes, have tried making my own. :P Last year when Brant went to Jakarta he bought real tortilla chips for $8 a bag (it was a big bag) and a jar of Pace Picante Sauce and we ate chips and salsa for dinner one night... nothing else. But Jakarta's 3000 miles away, so can't exactly drop by to get groceries.

Missing America

Lately I've gotten lots of comments on how hard it must be to be sick here without the comforts of "home." ...I think what people mean by that is "Poor dear stuck in a 3rd world country with no medical care and lots of bugs and heat and dirt." In my opinion it's about the same being sick here as it is in America - it's crummy either place. Only real plus to being sick in America is take-out options are a lot more plentiful there and frozen food is easy for the poor husband trying to scrounge up some food for the fam .....that and if you get really sick you can always go to the hospital and see doctors who actually went to medical school. Details.

So, truth be told, moments where I am really discouraged and sick make me do miss America more and certain American things that would make my life easier and more enjoyable. Tonight those things are -

- lunch meat - would kill for a Subway or any kind of decent sandwhich

- cereal - our options here include corn flakes, homemade granola, and occasionally rice krispies... all get old (and soggy!) fast

- cottage cheese

- applesauce - hard to raise little kids without this staple

- carpet - would love to lie on the floor

- automatic washing machines and dryers - if I ever hear another American woman complain about doing laundry, I might scream... all you have to do is throw the stupid clothes in the machine and it does all the work!

- fresh berries

- Starbucks - might be really cliche to miss Starbucks, but I love how "American" it is and how as an American I feel comfortable getting a Frappacino and sitting in a big comfy chair and chatting with a friend. Just part of our culture that does not translate over here. I think I also miss it because I so often met friends for a cup of coffee and I miss my friends in America.

Most of the time I enjoy being over here. We have gotten over the initial culture shock moving to a new country phase and this is home... I have my house decorated and we have a decent pizza restaurant in town and have friends. We feel comfortable and can live in a different culture that is totally different than the one we were raised in and we feel this is where the Lord would have us serve Him. I don't constantly miss life in America or dream about living there. But when I get sick I do miss lying on carpet...

Sick

I have been sick the past couple weeks with an illness called chikungunya. You can Wikipedia it. I had never heard of it either, but it's a virus that is spread by mosquitos... similar to dengue fever, but no rash. Instead it attacks your joints and totally wipes you out of any semblance of energy to live, breathe, get out of bed.... After a week of intense pain (think labor - no exaggeration - I've gone through it 3 times with no epidurals) I'm now "better" but I have very little energy. They say it can take a couple MONTHS to feel "normal" again.

Trouble is Brant is now sick. I'll spare you the gory details, but he got an amoeba, which does a nasty number on your digestive track. So we're both kinda out of it and the poor little boys just kinda run and play around us as we lie around sick.

So, I'm killing time til it's late enough to go to bed at a respectable hour. :) Thought I'd add a couple pics from life of late.

Elijah is growing up so fast. He'll be 5 next month... when did he turn into a little boy with a personality of his own? He likes to "help" with Ezra....

Elijah in his "boat" listening to his iPod... yes, I know a bit extravagant for a 4 year old to have (it's one of the small cheap ones) ...but it has saved us a boatload in not having to haul his 50 million kids' CDs around the planet. :) Plus he sits for hours totally still and quiet listening to "his" music.

Caleb

Do I need to say more?

Caleb as "Jesus"

Caleb is our ham. Not sure where he gets it from because neither Brant nor I are real "life-of-the-party" type people. But at almost 3, he keeps us laughing... most of the day. Among his best one liners...

"I can't like it" (with a very scrunched up little face) regarding any food remotely spicy, green and vegetable looking, or new.

"I squishing. I squishing." Sitting on the couch reading books with Brant and Elijah.

"I Jesus" With a blanket wrapped around his head.

"I like move it. I like move it. I like move it." That's him singing along to Madagascar - complete with motions.

"Hallalu... hallalu... hallalu..." Many mornings we wake up to hear him "singing" in his bed.

Food and boys

Tonight at the dinner table I looked around and realized I was the only one wearing a shirt at the table. The heat today was unbearable, compounded by the fact the electricity was off all day and our generator won't run our AC. So at dinner, even little fat Ezra was sitting in his eating chair with no shirt on. I kinda felt out of place. :) (And as I was sweating, a tad bit jealous!)

So, we finally got Ezra to eat! Unlike the older two boys, Ezra has not really taken to eating solid food. We have tried bananas, rice cereal, you name it for the past two weeks, and it just comes right back out. The baby book says he lacks "oral motor skills." But apparently being in a cooler climate helped him - while we were at our regional conference in the mountains last week, he inhaled most of a sweet potato from a traditional feast the neighboring tribal people held for us. I was a tad nervous that the first food he actually ate could potentially give him some horrible parasite or hepatitis or something like that (not really, it was cooked) but he loved it and since has really enjoyed eating - pulling the spoon towards his mouth if we don't shovel it in fast enough.

Today I fed him some of this new fruit we brought back from the mountains - a type of passionfruit that looks like a blend of pomegranate (millions of little seeds with fruit around it) and snot (think the color and texture) Despite the appearance, it tastes really good and Ezra loved it. We'll see what the diaper looks like tomorrow...